Hey you, good to be back eh? I know, I feel the same way. You’re probably thinking, what really happened? Is she going to say? Or is she in a better place? You don’t have to guess for too long because my answer is no on all counts. But l’ll rather be here than to be stuck in a loop that never seems to end.

A loop I think most of us are familiar with and yet still stuck in. Most times we say or think to ourselves that once i get out of this situation, then i’ll be okay, then I can go back to doing what I usually do and being who i regularly am. Hehehe 😂 laughs in delusion. There are some situations you get out of or decisions you make that are the first piece of the domino effect. It just goes on and on from there.

The person you used to be or things you used to do were the sacrifices you had to make to get through the challenge and now you’re stuck trying to find your way back to what doesn’t exist anymore. I’ll be more relatable, that’s what my entire break was about, that if I just got through this, then i’ll be fine and I can come back to my happy place again.

Now i wonder how I convinced myself to believe that. First, because it never seems to end, it’s one thing after another, and another, then something else, and then that. Secondly, I don’t even remember how it used to be before the loop. And because I keep wanting what i’m not sure of, I have been stuck on the way and never gotten to write to you all these while.

But today, i’m here, not because i found my way back but because I made a new way. There’s no time to waste and consistency isn’t what you do but who you are. So, it wouldn’t matter if everything else in my life is in chaos, what would matter is if i’m the person who can still be creative in the chaos.

We all want our lives to go a certain way, we have it all planned out and spend a lot of energy and time trying to make it stick to the plan. So much that we protect the plan more than actually carrying out the plan. What if you save that energy? What if you just acknowledge that things will not always go according to plan and be okay with that? 

What if instead of fighting so much for how things were or should be, you focus on making the best of how things are now. I’m positive it’ll get better for us all, but until then remember that you can make new ways in the chaos. Even if it feels unfamiliar, it’s still your life, don’t be scared to try.

Song of the moment- Looks Like Me – by Dean Lewis.

I wish that you would be kinder to yourself this week❤️ Take care.