Before writing this article, there were so many things I wanted: who I wanted to be, what I wanted to have, and the places I wanted to go. Each time I crossed one thing off the list, I’d add at least two more. It felt endless. But lately, I’ve found myself asking “why” more often. And when you’re on a journey of asking “why,” it becomes clear that there’s no inherent meaning to anything except the meaning you decide to give it. If you’re not careful, though, this realization can lead to apathy; a state where everything feels pointless, and you lose interest in life itself.

Yet, beyond that apathy lies the potential for true freedom: freedom from conventional expectations. At least, that’s what I hope to discover as I follow this path.

So, why do I want to be married? Why do I want kids? Why do I work so hard? Why is my life the way it is? Why am I never satisfied? Why do I constantly seek more? Why should my life mirror everyone else’s? Why do I keep comparing myself? Why is my timeline different? Why do they care about me, and why do I care about them? Why do I feel the way I feel? Why am I unhappy? Why do I enjoy some things and dislike others? Why, and so many more whys?

When you examine it deeply enough, you start to realize your reasons are often shaped by external influences. You aren’t the sole source of your decisions; instead, they’re rooted in societal standards and the desire to be accepted. The early decades of your life are spent learning about the world and what defines an acceptable, successful life. The rest of your time is often consumed by striving to achieve that vision. But life has a way of reminding you that you’re unique, and while you’re focused on fitting in, the challenges you face are uniquely designed to help you stand out.

You wonder why your story feels so different from the “norm,” yet everyone else is likely thinking the same about their own lives. The reason it appears that way is because you can only truly see yourself. You believe you understand others because you observe their lives, but you don’t see them as intimately as you see yourself. As a result, you might end up building a life that aligns with what’s acceptable to others but feels disconnected from who you truly are.

Do you genuinely want the things you’re striving for? Or do you want them because other people have them?

If you focus on your own life instead of constantly comparing it to others, you might see how the desire to be “normal” has robbed you of your individuality. Your ambitions are valid, and you can achieve them, but pursuing them for the wrong reasons can make you feel enslaved to life.

Your choices and your life only need to make sense to you. They don’t have to be perfect or worthy of social media highlights, and they don’t have to resemble anyone else’s path.

Song of the moment – I’d hate to be my friend – by MICO

I hope this month brings you good tidings❤️