When you tell someone about yourself, especially someone new, you easily point out your likes and dislikes. Places you love to go to, what you do in your free time, or even your favorite person.

If it gets lengthier, you can also add the things you like or don’t like about other people.

Why? It’s because you hope to build a connection or a relationship with your likes and dislikes as common ground.

There’s no problem with that. I have made relationships that way too, but they never last. Conflicts originated from setting clear boundaries to respecting my principles and values.

Regardless of what you like or don’t like, your principles, values, and boundaries almost never change. Your preferences are fickle feelings that change easily. I used to love ketchup, now I throw up if I taste a spot.

Just like the ketchup example, my taste in people has also changed. Now, I do not want friends that just want to play all the time; I want serious minded adults. Maybe I’ll want to play again when I retire or gossip partners? The list goes on…

But values and principles are consistent. They’re based on what you’ve learnt from your family, environment, yourself, and even life itself.

Your values and principles are fundamentals of your personality, and they draw out the form of your character. Their evolution influence your preferences.

Boundaries came from relationships with people. They’re formed past pain. Although they’re flexible, they’re scars on your person and symbolize what you’ve dealt with.

It’s why you look twice at the edge of the table before walking past it so you don’t hurt your toe. It’s why there are always reasons for your actions.

And so I thought, why don’t we make connections based on our principles, values, and boundaries? Honestly, we don’t have the luxury of time to keep up with meaningless connections, 1992 was thirty years ago.

Maybe you fear what people would think. They might see you differently if they found out you value God over money or that you don’t use cuss words because it defies your principle of respect.

There are so many things about you that define how unique you are and how wonderful your story is. Be okay with being you.

Next time when you meet someone, let them know why you prefer your sauce on the side and not on the dish itself. Make your principles, values and boundaries known and don’t lure them in on fleeting feelings.

Be you, without remorse, the real ones will always stay.

Here’s a random song from my playlist – Hate my Guts by Sofia Kalberg

Have a wonderful weekend 🥰🥰